He'd been so damned close to the only thing he want- Alright, not the only thing he wanted, not today, but the only thing he wanted that he trusted himself to have. When Vax'ildan had come up to the rooftop and found himself blessedly alone, nestled into a deep fold of shadow, he'd only meant to sit and take a few moments to calm himself in the cool night air before he locked himself away in his room until morning.
It was an intensely disconcerting feeling, to not trust himself. The people he'd unintentionally collided with earlier were all lovely, in their own ways. But he should be a better man than to become so preoccupied with it. He should be stronger than some stupid, primal, animal impulse to bone. And Vax was, was the thing. He'd learned to put himself in check long ago and keep himself there unless it was something he wanted enough to devote himself to it, damn the consequences. He loved Keyleth, and had decided there would be none but her. Yet they'd been apart for hardly a month, and... It wasn't the women he'd had to stop from getting too far into his pants that bothered him. It was how much the day's events had stirred him up and confused him. He was more tempted by the flesh than he should be, even when he hadn't been dosed with whatever sex madness this was, and that troubled him in a way that reached deep.
Not fucking her. Not now. Please. He watched. Silently, uselessly willing her to go away.
Re: Evening - for Vax
Literally, if he wasn't careful.
He'd been so damned close to the only thing he want- Alright, not the only thing he wanted, not today, but the only thing he wanted that he trusted himself to have. When Vax'ildan had come up to the rooftop and found himself blessedly alone, nestled into a deep fold of shadow, he'd only meant to sit and take a few moments to calm himself in the cool night air before he locked himself away in his room until morning.
It was an intensely disconcerting feeling, to not trust himself. The people he'd unintentionally collided with earlier were all lovely, in their own ways. But he should be a better man than to become so preoccupied with it. He should be stronger than some stupid, primal, animal impulse to bone. And Vax was, was the thing. He'd learned to put himself in check long ago and keep himself there unless it was something he wanted enough to devote himself to it, damn the consequences. He loved Keyleth, and had decided there would be none but her. Yet they'd been apart for hardly a month, and... It wasn't the women he'd had to stop from getting too far into his pants that bothered him. It was how much the day's events had stirred him up and confused him. He was more tempted by the flesh than he should be, even when he hadn't been dosed with whatever sex madness this was, and that troubled him in a way that reached deep.
Not fucking her. Not now. Please. He watched. Silently, uselessly willing her to go away.