strangetrip | For Sunny

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For Sunny

Caroline had actually been enjoying April Fools for once. She was unchanged but watching the rest of the inn go a little crazy had been diverting for once. And then she saw Sunny's message and realized that just because she wasn't different, that didn't mean someone wasn't suffering because of what she was.

Caroline dipped back into her office, grabbed a couple bottles of bourbon out of her desk drawer and several more bags of expired-for-transfusions-but-still-good-for-vampires blood out of the mini fridge she'd liberated from storage ages ago. She wrote a quick message to Regina to cover her absence and walked at nothing more than normal human speed toward Sunny's room.

Thankfully, most people were more concerned with their own drama and she made it to the Safari Room without meeting anyone else. She knocked on the door. "Sunny, it's Caroline. I can help."

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Sunny had shut herself in the bathroom, where the sun couldn't get her, and where she knelt on the tile praying fervently.

The smell of blood made her mouth water and she wanted to be sick with herself. If not for the rosary in her hand, she would have torn--quite literally--out of the room. "How?" she asked, voice thick.

Caroline glanced around to be sure that no one was nearby. "Because I've been there," she said steadily. "Let me in and I'll explain."

Sunny took a deep breath and finished the Ave Maria in desperation--she took more comfort than she should in the fact that her rosary did not burn her--and shakily got to her feet.

Her self-control did not last, given how quickly she moved to the door. It was only her familiarity with playing with time that kept her from doing anything stupid moving that fast. But she had to be more careful at the door.

She opened it only a crack, and herself fully behind the door. Only the knowing she would burn kept her this controlled. She'd already had to do battle with the windows.

Faster than was humanly possible, faster even than Sunny had been, Caroline pushed the door open, let herself in and closed it again. She took a quick turn around the room, making sure Sunny had already done all she could to block out the sunlight then deposited the bag she carried on the first flat surface.

"Hi. It's okay, I know you're hungry." Even as she said it, she pulled out one of the blood bags and held it out. "Here. This will help."

Caroline remembered that first hunger keenly. There hadn't been any room for thought. She'd done what was instinctively necessary and only the fact that she was, at heart, a huge control freak had kept the worst of her impulses in check.

Sunny wasn't listening to the reassurances. She felt the fangs drop--like an erection happening in her mouth, she'd think later--and went right for the blood.

She was not careful, and she had never handled blood bags before. More than a little wound up down her face, her neck. The smell was both disgusting and delicious.

It had taken the edge off, but not sated the hunger. Sunny shuddered and let out a sound somewhere between a gasp and a sob, horror and relief all at once.

While Sunny drained the first bag, Caroline took the first bottle of bourbon out and uncapped it. She poured a generous amount into one of the room's standard issue coffee mugs and held that out. The smell of blood was inviting but not a flicker of dark veins showed around Caroline's eyes. "Alcohol helps curb the cravings. Gives you back a little control. Weird, I know but it works. I'm really sorry about this."

She drank, thinking of Jackson and hating this all the more for the way she couldn't divorce the smell of bourbon from him. "How," Sunny managed to ask, when she wanted to tear off her shirt and suck the spilled blood out of it, "are you not burning?"

Caroline lifted up her right hand, showing Sunny the silver ring with the lapis stone. "There's a spell on this ring. It protects me from the sun. My best friend is a witch. Was a witch," she corrected herself with a sigh. "I don't actually know how it works other than magic."

She took out more blood bags, lining them up neatly, then set the bottles of bourbon up next to them. "You don't have to use these. Rabbits work too. They're not as good, but they'll keep you fed if the idea of human blood freaks you out."

"I'm not making past all these white people I already kind of want to slap constantly to get to rabbits," Sunny said bluntly, almost a growl as she took another blood bag. This process was neater than the last one. At least this time, more of the blood made it in, though she had no idea what to make of the taste. It was... something about it didn't satisfy, but she hadn't the first clue what it was.

"Yeah, okay, that's fair." As a white person Sunny probably wanted to slap, Caroline was not about to tell her she was wrong. Sunny hadn't torn anyone's throat out yet, so she probably wasn't a ripper. "The clinic tosses out blood when it gets older, so this isn't the freshest of stuff but it's good enough. You can feed from people, if there's someone you trust to know what you are."

Caroline hesitated then decided that this was her fault so she better be thorough. "Regina knows what I...we are. Sam does too. And Coby. You can trust them." There were others but not that Caroline would suggest Sunny feed from. "If you do decide to feed from someone, have them put it in a glass for you. It can be hard to stop the first time you drink from the vein."

"Once the sun goes down, you can go out. I don't know how to make another ring. I know it has to be lapis but that's about it."

"I already told everyone," Sunny pointed out. She was, barely, starting to settle to the point that she at least no longer felt like she wanted to shake out of her skin. "And I don't care. If I had my way about it, the person at the door would have been one of those hunter types here to do their damn job."

She poured herself another drink. "Or another magic type to lock me in. It seems I can't do that for myself right now."

Edited 2019-04-03 07:05 (UTC)

Caroline's jaw clenched. She'd watched too many people die when they didn't have to. "You don't want to die. This isn't as bad as it seems."

She folded her arms and started to pace, three steps one way, then three steps the other. "You're still you. That's...look. I died. You didn't. I don't know what the hell is going on today, but you're still alive and knowing this place, this fuckery isn't going to last forever. When it's over, you'll be back to normal. You're not evil or a monster or anything right now. So...until then, yeah, you've gotta stay inside when it's sunny. But you're strong, you're fast, you can eat literally anything without gaining a pound and you're more you than ever in some ways."

"And how long does it take to learn control?" Sunny asked, entirely uninterested on the point of whether she was a monster or not. If her instinct now was only being tethered by the fact that she couldn't leave her room, then whatever she was she was a danger and she didn't much care for word-mincing.

"That depends on the person. It's easier if you have someone there to help and explain what's up. If you stay fed, the hunger is manageable. Like...dessert when you're already full." Caroline tilted her head. "You're a witch, right? You use magic? You probably already have plenty of self-control. That's the thing about what I...we are. It just amplifies your base traits." She gestured to herself, "Neurotic control freak, for example."

Sunny's gaze was so flat it was withering. "In other words," she said, "You have no way of knowing if I'll drain someone after sundown."

Caroline frowned. "I can't guarantee it, no."

Because she didn't know Sunny that well. Oh, she knew about her - Caroline knew about everyone - but she didn't, like, hang out with the other woman. And everyone reacted to being a vampire differently. Her dad had refused to drink and died in front of her rather than be a monster like his little girl. Kind Stefan was the worst kind of killer when he tasted blood. Elena had fixated on Damon of all people and couldn't drink from anything but his fucking vein.

So yeah, she wasn't going to promise anything except, "I'm not planning on turning you loose unsupervised though. You're lucid, you're rational and you're not lunging for this," she held up another blood bag to demonstrate, "so I'm pretty sure you're gonna be fine."

Sunny had never had a choice about being those things or not. Straddling every relevant line in her life, the only way to exist was to be constantly on alert for threats and for ways that your mere existence was upsetting people. And it had made her a good witch, one attentive and clever enough to survive a djinn by the skin of her teeth when she was only thirteen.

All atop a core of resentment and rage from being absolutely done living that way.

She took the blood, because it was more attractive--more necessary--than punching this woman in the face. "Not good enough."

Caroline suppressed the urge to roll her eyes. Sunny had been a vampire for less than a day. She was allowed to be salty. But Jesus Christ on a pogo stick, what the hell did she want Caroline to do?

"Fine, fuck it. I'll just ferry you blood until this is over then. And then when this is over, I'll make sure you don't remember it. How about that?" At this rate, she was going to go through Caroline's stash. Looked like Thumper was on the menu for one of them at least.

The offer to wipe her memory turned Sunny's glare from withering to murder. "Get out."

Caroline threw up her hands. "Call me if you eat someone. I'll be in the office."

With that, she blurred to the door and out, leaving behind the drink and the blood.

Sunny had said what she wanted--someone to do what she couldn't, which was either end her or lock her in. Justifying Caroline's existence as a good little vampire who could pass was not on the list. She'd been here over a year and most of them hadn't known there was even a vampire living here. Fine. Sunny wouldn't out her, nor did she have any particular problem with Caroline about that. But Sunny had no faith in herself to face temptation and it was nonsense wishful thinking to treat the situation otherwise.

Caroline had been right about one thing--as of right now she had no way of knowing this was permanent. But God knew she refused to do this for more than maybe a couple of days.

So all right, the white girl was useless. Not surprising. But Sunny could at least think now, so she'd either have to find someone with magic or figure out how to work something without her juju right now.

She took herself back into the bathroom with the blood bag, books, and journal. Loki seemed like her best bet for practical.

It'd be just like the basement. Except this time she'd be the girl and the monster at the same time.

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