[EP] The Worst Birthday

[st_abby]

Of course, everybody had birthdays - even if they didn't know what day it was on the calendar, that didn't stop someone having them. Vax'ildan hadn't honestly thought much about it, until Joanna had got talking when to plant what one afternoon amongst the herbs in her garden. Seasons, months, weeks, days... They were different in this world from what Vax knew. Nevertheless, when he stopped to do a bit of his own math, he thought it must be very near his own birthday in Exandria.

Their birthday. His, by only a couple of minutes, and then Vex'ahlia's.

It seemed a stupid thing to get hung up about. But once it (she) had wormed its way into his brain, his heart, he couldn't get it (her) out, and it became a crushing reminder that Vex could be lost to him forever. He didn't have much in the way of distractions, and the more he tried to forget about it, the worse it had got until he sank into a drowning sulk. He avoided everyone and everything including his mirror-matched room, effectively vanishing for a few days on end, until gravely admitting that the only way out might very well be through.

Which is how he ended up sitting in the one corner of a booth in the cafe, armor exchanged for a simple sleeveless tunic and loose pants from Songrun, staring at the empty seat across from him with arms folded on the table in a bit of a hunch.

"Get us a drink," he told the passers-by mirthlessly, without so much as turning to look at them or stopping to count how many he'd had already. Did it matter? "It's our birthday."

Comments

[st_abby]

"Percival! ...I was just about to ask my dear buddy Kashaw the Merciful to heal me up some so I don't die of alcohol poisoning and turn into a ghost and...and ghost around in his room forever, because we're trapped," Vax'ildan leaned dangerously far in Percy's direction to tell him such. "And it's our birthday, so he even feels just a little bad for how miserable and pathetic I am. And because I want us to go swimming in the pool - you and me and him - without the drowning part."

He looked back at Kash hopefully, trying to give him a wry smile, that coincidentally looked more like he was about to be sick.

[st_ingofthehundred]

"Kashaw the Merciful?" Kash gave Vax a flinty look but then sucked down the rest of his drink and shrugged. "Better than Cashew, I think. But listen, I can't cure drunk, and I can't reverse poisoning before you're poisoned, and I already have a fucking ghost in my room and it's freaking me the hell out."

Maybe he'd had a little more to drink that was strictly necessary, but hey, it was our birthday, so why not? And if this sudden turn toward swimming with Percy's appearance seemed a little too convenient, again, it was our birthday and he'd been a dick long enough and it was time to humor him.

"I can cure drowning, even if you'll still have to puke up all the water. So sure. Why not, let's tempt fate?" As long as he wasn't too drunk to swim (and he was pretty sure he wasn't), the worst thing that could happen is he'd give Vax a 100 gp birthday present in the form of diamond dust.

[st_ockandbarrel]

There was something vaguely wrong with the way Kash was reacting but Percy couldn't put his finger on it. So instead, he grabbed Vax and hauled him up out of his seat. "It wouldn't be the first time he's drowned. He did it in the Feywild too."

[st_abby]

"I don't remember Kash drowning in the Feywild," Vax mumbled at Percy, drunkenly unconcerned with Kashaw railing at him about what a cleric could and couldn't do, inclined or not. He didn't magic. And the reeling from drink (careful, careful, there we go, you brace Percy, he'll brace you, you can probably get as far as the pool that way) had been the intent of this whole shitshow pity-party in the first place.

So... Whatever. Kash wouldn't let him die, he was pretty sure.

"Don't, then," Vax told Kash, perhaps abruptly. He reached to sling the arm not already gripping Percy around Kashaw's shoulder for additional support. "Just... Keep us company awhile, yeah?"

[st_ingofthehundred]

"I didn't. You did. But I don't think I knew that before right now." Kash's gaze narrowed on Percy, because he didn't think Percy was as drunk as Vax, but if Vax had drowned in the Feywild because he couldn't swim...

No wait. That wasn't right. Vax swam when he got the feathers. There had been potions or spells. Water-breathing, he thought. Not swimming.

He sighed and hitched Vax's arm up over his shoulder. "Sure, buddy. I'll keep you company. If I let you drown, Vex will kill me and then she and Z won't be friends anymore."

[st_ockandbarrel]

Percy gave Kash a bland look, not trying for innocence, because...well, clearly. But at least without any overtly sinister intent.

The trio stumble-walked through the hotel, Vax barely on his feet, and Percy only slightly better. Percy narrowed his eyes at a sofa that looked like it might leap on them and corrected course.

The entire group bounced off a wall like a bit of rubber.

[st_abby]

"The pool s'not a magic river trying to drown me, and -
my sister and me," Vax insisted, hardly remarking the bumping and staggered steps involved in their progress. They were still upright and mobile. "I can swim, alright? And Vex isn't here. So what's it matter?"

His meaning was as muddy as his intent. Forward, was the important thing.

[st_ingofthehundred]

"Maybe it'll be easier than walking," Kash observed dryly as they ricocheted off yet another wall. "At least you're not wearing armor to weigh you down."

Sensible, he thought. Pragmatic. That was the way to go with this. Especially if Percy's significant capital L looks meant anything. Guy had no idea how much his face gave away when he wasn't sober enough to be Stoic McNobleface.

[st_ockandbarrel]

Outside, the sun was bright and direct, a painful insult to the deep haze of alcohol. "We're doing fine," Percy insisted despite that. Outside had its advantages. No walls to bump into. And the pool was a bright blue beacon in the middle distance.

[st_abby]

No, Vax gave it a wobbly thought, he hadn't worn his armor. That belonged to a goddess, after all, not him, and this was very Un-Championlike behavior. Probably he'd spend the next couple of days getting this all out of his system and meditating and miserably begging Ignis to make him the blackest of coffee and the greasiest, spiciest food they had to hand before he'd put the armor back on.

Also he weighed less and that was probably really good if there was a pool involved. Which - "Theeeeere it is," he smiled triumphantly. "What about you, Kash? Are you going to strip to your manties, or wear the whole lot, or... Or are we all skinny-dipping?"

[st_ingofthehundred]

"I wasn't planning to..." His gaze narrowed on Vax. "Manties?" Wow. Either Vax was even more drunk than he thought or he'd been hanging out with the blonde chick way more than Kash thought. Or maybe de Rolo as much as he thought. That grin was...uh, fucked up.

"Yeah, you know, I'll just sit here in case you drown." Which would give them the chance to throw him in. Since it now seemed that may have been the plan. What? It was still our birthday and he only had victory or revivification to give.

[st_ockandbarrel]

"You're skinny. I'm not skinny," Percy corrected. He had it on good authority that his shoulders were problematic for his tailor and not for his girlfriend (who, it must be said, had excellent shoulders of her own that he missed keenly.)

The edge of the pool glistened invitingly and Percy veered for it. "You really should test the waters for us, Cashew."

[st_abby]

Vax was skinny. Not for an elf, but... He was a ropey motherfucker, is what he was. Lean, but densely corded with muscle. For deft strikes, and dodging, and...shoving into pools?

"You give... The nicest gifts," Vax insisted with joviality, though it probably wasn't clear which of them he was talking to. He twisted and pushed in one smooth surge of motion, to throw all their easily redistributed (wobbly) weight into his hip aligned with Kashaw. ...Of course, that meant that Vax himself was definitely going to follow, pickled as he was, and Percy's odds of keeping his footing probably weren't good either. But it totally counted as throwing Kash into the pool, he'd decided already.

[st_ingofthehundred]

None of them were slouches when it came to upper body muscular development. Not that being "buff" (thanks, Z) spared him the indignity of being shoved bodily into the pool by two drunk-ass motherfuckers who were the only friends he had in this place. Insight was all well and good, in that he'd managed to avoid breathing at the wrong moment, but it wasn't shit for withstanding nearly twice his own weight in motion.

It was however, outstanding for preparing and releasing a cantrip that pushed the water into a much more impressive splash. Spectator Amusement 3, Dignity none.

[st_ockandbarrel]

Percy belated realized that he was far too drunk to appropriately release Kash about the time he hit the water and his glasses flew off his face. Luckily, there was nothing to see besides the turbid water.

He shoved off Kash and attempted to locate the surface. It was not immediately obvious.

[st_abby]

Exceptionally dramatic splashing and all, Vax sputtered and bobbed his way to the surface of the water, not sure and not especially caring how much of the motion was him and how much was the wet stuff around him. And when he was relatively certain he'd got to where he wasn't in actual danger of drowning, he looked from the white-haired one to the other and back, breaking a grin and cackling a laugh.

No, it didn't begin to take the place of Vex'ahlia. Nothing could, and there was no point in trying. But he was with his mates, those that knew her and loved her, too, which had to be the next best thing. It was a far sight better than being alone. It would do, for now.

At least until they squelched their way out again and found some towels.