[EP] The Worst Birthday

[st_abby]

Of course, everybody had birthdays - even if they didn't know what day it was on the calendar, that didn't stop someone having them. Vax'ildan hadn't honestly thought much about it, until Joanna had got talking when to plant what one afternoon amongst the herbs in her garden. Seasons, months, weeks, days... They were different in this world from what Vax knew. Nevertheless, when he stopped to do a bit of his own math, he thought it must be very near his own birthday in Exandria.

Their birthday. His, by only a couple of minutes, and then Vex'ahlia's.

It seemed a stupid thing to get hung up about. But once it (she) had wormed its way into his brain, his heart, he couldn't get it (her) out, and it became a crushing reminder that Vex could be lost to him forever. He didn't have much in the way of distractions, and the more he tried to forget about it, the worse it had got until he sank into a drowning sulk. He avoided everyone and everything including his mirror-matched room, effectively vanishing for a few days on end, until gravely admitting that the only way out might very well be through.

Which is how he ended up sitting in the one corner of a booth in the cafe, armor exchanged for a simple sleeveless tunic and loose pants from Songrun, staring at the empty seat across from him with arms folded on the table in a bit of a hunch.

"Get us a drink," he told the passers-by mirthlessly, without so much as turning to look at them or stopping to count how many he'd had already. Did it matter? "It's our birthday."

Comments

[st_ingofthehundred]

Kash hadn't been with Vox Machina often enough or for long enough to develop a Jenga-sense, but Z hadn't answered his Sending again, no one needed healing, and nothing needed killing. A drink, or several, were all the day had to offer.

When he spotted Vax in the Cafe, he simply assumed that the rogue had come to a similar conclusion. He'd grabbed a pitcher from the pretty barmaid (who looked a little on the sad side, he thought) and two glasses and gone to join the guy without giving thought to the slumped over figure.

The words arrested him on several counts and while he empathized (Z was a sister as much as a lover), Vax didn't need him to coddle him. "Suck it up, Hot Dog. At least you can celebrate your nameday without remembering a wife you didn't want."

[st_abby]

"You're going to tell me I'm not allowed to miss my sister on our birthday because you win for suffering? Because you're...bound to a goddess that brings death, and that scares the shit out of you?" Vax hadn't looked over from where he'd graduated to a slump against the far wall of his booth seat, head resting against the wall. "I like you, Kash. But you are an asshole," he muttered.

[st_ingofthehundred]

Kash poured Vax another drink and shoved it in front of him with a shrug. "What'd you expect? A hug? Sympathy? Half a dozen beautiful men and women are already offering that." He took a long swallow of his ale which was, honestly, unexpectedly good. "I'd have straight up offered to let you hit me, but I'm not Grog and daggers hurt."

[st_abby]

There were offers, sure. And Vax did appreciate what they represented. They just weren't from the one person he needed more than anything.

"Not from you," Vax admitted. Kash was rarely sympathetic. Even when he was, it wasn't hugs and gentle words.

"You think you would've tried, with Keyleth? If things had been... Different?"

[st_ingofthehundred]

That settled, Kash sank into the corner of the booth. He had to admit, the damned things were comfortable, no matter how ugly they were.

He gave Vax's question due consideration and answered with a shrug. "Hard to imagine now. With things like they are." Vax with Keyleth and he and Z. Any other day, he would've left it there, but Vax was looking for distraction and Kash wasn't enough of an asshole to refuse it. "I mean, no question she's fucking hot, and she grows on you, but I can't see really see that working out long term."

What he'd felt for Keyleth had been a combination of being impressed, relief at being done, apologetic for being such an ass to her the rest of the time, attraction, and the first sense of what he'd learned from Z was camaraderie. Not love, and besides, "She deserves better than an asshole married to a death goddess who scares the shit out of him." So did Z, but she was...different. She'd spit in Vesh's face and start the fight if it ever came to it.

[st_abby]

"Yeah. She does," Vax confessed, somber enough that it didn't seem he meant Kash at all.

"You must miss Zahra," he said plainly.

[st_ingofthehundred]

"Way to pour salt in it, buddy." The words lacked any particular sting, in part because he'd already raised the beer glass to his mouth and was speaking into it. He drank half of the beer with a single swallow and tried hard not to think about Z while answering Vax.

"Like breathing," he acknowledged after a moment. "She's everything."

In retrospect, he probably should've stuck to snarling. It hurt less.

[st_abby]

"And so I give to you the friendly advice that was given to me, in this, my hour of need," Vax leaned in a bit, taking a beat longer to remember what the words were exactly. "Suck it up."

[st_ingofthehundred]

Eyes, bright gold and pale blue blinked, and Kash opened his mouth to speak, shut it again, and then gave in to a bark of surprised laughter. "Touche, man." Still smiling, he nudged Vax's hand with his own, pushing it toward his beer. "I really am sorry about Vex. She's pretty amazing. Z adores her."

[st_abby]

"Feeling's mutual," Vax mumbled towards the rim of the glass, as he obligingly drank. "For Zahra. From Vex. I mean, I like her, too, but they're - you know," he tried clarifying, and gave up there before he got any more confusing.

[st_ingofthehundred]

"Which kind of 'you know' are we talking about here?" Kash's eyebrow swept up in something like amusement. "The you know where drunk and words aren't a good combination or the you know where I don't know but I kinda wish I did know, because now that you mention it, that would be super-hot."

What? He hadn't been exactly sober when the conversation started.

[st_abby]

"It's the you know that's my sister you're talking about."

Yes, Vex was a beautiful grown woman with a perfectly healthy libido - which Percival somehow, inexplicably, seemed to satisfy. Vax was glad for whatever made her happy.

No, he really wasn't going to try picturing it in his head, and his grossed-out-brother look at Kash said as much.

[st_ingofthehundred]

"Your sister and my girlfriend," Kash agreed almost cheerfuly, but then thought the better of imagining it too closely. It really wouldn't help missing them any to think about the things Z could do with her tail.

Right. Changing the subject.

"How long do you figure we've got before Percy blows something up trying to get back to her. Your sister. Not Z."

[st_abby]

"He would've done it already, if he thought he knew how," Vax said with certainty even beyond his intoxication. "He's not given up, that's for sure - but finding a way back home is more your department than ours I'd think." Meaning magic, not... Killing people. Or shooting them.

That's right. There was something about Percy... No, wait. It was Kash. Percy was getting Kash...

[st_ockandbarrel]

Kash was not in his room. Nor in the stables. Nor in the gym or on the trails or in a hole somewhere dark and deep where he could brood about not having Zahra around like he was the only one missing someone from home.

In fact, it had been an hour and sobriety was starting to making confused noises in Percy's brain and he still hadn't found Kash.

Percy wandered back into the cafe, planning to get another drink for fortification, when he saw Vax and Kash sitting together.

He was briefly annoyed, then pleased at Vax's cleverness in catching their quarry. "Ah, there you are. Been looking everywhere."

[st_abby]

"Percival! ...I was just about to ask my dear buddy Kashaw the Merciful to heal me up some so I don't die of alcohol poisoning and turn into a ghost and...and ghost around in his room forever, because we're trapped," Vax'ildan leaned dangerously far in Percy's direction to tell him such. "And it's our birthday, so he even feels just a little bad for how miserable and pathetic I am. And because I want us to go swimming in the pool - you and me and him - without the drowning part."

He looked back at Kash hopefully, trying to give him a wry smile, that coincidentally looked more like he was about to be sick.

[st_ingofthehundred]

"Kashaw the Merciful?" Kash gave Vax a flinty look but then sucked down the rest of his drink and shrugged. "Better than Cashew, I think. But listen, I can't cure drunk, and I can't reverse poisoning before you're poisoned, and I already have a fucking ghost in my room and it's freaking me the hell out."

Maybe he'd had a little more to drink that was strictly necessary, but hey, it was our birthday, so why not? And if this sudden turn toward swimming with Percy's appearance seemed a little too convenient, again, it was our birthday and he'd been a dick long enough and it was time to humor him.

"I can cure drowning, even if you'll still have to puke up all the water. So sure. Why not, let's tempt fate?" As long as he wasn't too drunk to swim (and he was pretty sure he wasn't), the worst thing that could happen is he'd give Vax a 100 gp birthday present in the form of diamond dust.

[st_ockandbarrel]

There was something vaguely wrong with the way Kash was reacting but Percy couldn't put his finger on it. So instead, he grabbed Vax and hauled him up out of his seat. "It wouldn't be the first time he's drowned. He did it in the Feywild too."

[st_abby]

"I don't remember Kash drowning in the Feywild," Vax mumbled at Percy, drunkenly unconcerned with Kashaw railing at him about what a cleric could and couldn't do, inclined or not. He didn't magic. And the reeling from drink (careful, careful, there we go, you brace Percy, he'll brace you, you can probably get as far as the pool that way) had been the intent of this whole shitshow pity-party in the first place.

So... Whatever. Kash wouldn't let him die, he was pretty sure.

"Don't, then," Vax told Kash, perhaps abruptly. He reached to sling the arm not already gripping Percy around Kashaw's shoulder for additional support. "Just... Keep us company awhile, yeah?"

[st_ingofthehundred]

"I didn't. You did. But I don't think I knew that before right now." Kash's gaze narrowed on Percy, because he didn't think Percy was as drunk as Vax, but if Vax had drowned in the Feywild because he couldn't swim...

No wait. That wasn't right. Vax swam when he got the feathers. There had been potions or spells. Water-breathing, he thought. Not swimming.

He sighed and hitched Vax's arm up over his shoulder. "Sure, buddy. I'll keep you company. If I let you drown, Vex will kill me and then she and Z won't be friends anymore."

[st_ockandbarrel]

Percy gave Kash a bland look, not trying for innocence, because...well, clearly. But at least without any overtly sinister intent.

The trio stumble-walked through the hotel, Vax barely on his feet, and Percy only slightly better. Percy narrowed his eyes at a sofa that looked like it might leap on them and corrected course.

The entire group bounced off a wall like a bit of rubber.

[st_abby]

"The pool s'not a magic river trying to drown me, and -
my sister and me," Vax insisted, hardly remarking the bumping and staggered steps involved in their progress. They were still upright and mobile. "I can swim, alright? And Vex isn't here. So what's it matter?"

His meaning was as muddy as his intent. Forward, was the important thing.

[st_ingofthehundred]

"Maybe it'll be easier than walking," Kash observed dryly as they ricocheted off yet another wall. "At least you're not wearing armor to weigh you down."

Sensible, he thought. Pragmatic. That was the way to go with this. Especially if Percy's significant capital L looks meant anything. Guy had no idea how much his face gave away when he wasn't sober enough to be Stoic McNobleface.

[st_ockandbarrel]

Outside, the sun was bright and direct, a painful insult to the deep haze of alcohol. "We're doing fine," Percy insisted despite that. Outside had its advantages. No walls to bump into. And the pool was a bright blue beacon in the middle distance.

[st_abby]

No, Vax gave it a wobbly thought, he hadn't worn his armor. That belonged to a goddess, after all, not him, and this was very Un-Championlike behavior. Probably he'd spend the next couple of days getting this all out of his system and meditating and miserably begging Ignis to make him the blackest of coffee and the greasiest, spiciest food they had to hand before he'd put the armor back on.

Also he weighed less and that was probably really good if there was a pool involved. Which - "Theeeeere it is," he smiled triumphantly. "What about you, Kash? Are you going to strip to your manties, or wear the whole lot, or... Or are we all skinny-dipping?"